


Singe's Romantic Songfic

by Singe_Addams



Category: Real Ghostbusters
Genre: Gen, Humor, Parody, Romance, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-18
Updated: 2013-01-18
Packaged: 2017-11-25 22:06:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/643448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Singe_Addams/pseuds/Singe_Addams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Egon and Janine have a romantic misunderstanding in the park. True love never did run smooth. And annoying ear worms don't help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Singe's Romantic Songfic

**Author's Note:**

> A parody of, and a tribute to, songfics. I believe fan writers should write whatever makes them happy, be it songfics, Mary Sues or Crack Fic (especially Crack Fic) even if more 'professional' ficcers turn up their noses at it. It's all fanfiction, people, you simply can't take it too seriously.

Janine threw open the door of the firehouse and stomped out. Five more seconds alone with Egon and she would have choked him. She turned the corner and slouched towards the park. It would be better to terrorize the squirrels and pigeons there than to take out her frustration on her friends or the oblivious object of her intense desire back at the Ghostbusters' firehouse.

Egon had rejected her again. Oh, I can’t go out with you, Janine, I’m a stupid, blind idiot with mold on the brain! Duh! I reproduce via sporazoa! Dur! I’m a pod-person! Doi!

Janine reached a pleasant, shady bench and sat down, angry and dejected.

_I was feeling done in, Couldn’t win. We’d only just kissed before. I thought there’s no use getting, Into heavy petting. It only leads to trouble and seat wetting..._

But, god, Egon was handsome. Well over six feet tall, graceful and intelligent with lustrous platinum-blond hair and deep blue eyes. His dangerous job kept his body hard and lean with character-adding scars here and there on his soft skin. Janine growled, thinking about him.

_Now all I want to know, Is how to go, I’ve tasted blood and I want more. More, more, more! I’ll put up no resistance, I want to stay the distance, I’ve got an itch to scratch! I need assistance!!_

“Janine?” It was Egon striding towards her and Janine came out of her slump and primly crossed her legs. She looked up at him unconcernedly. “What? I’m on break!” He stood over her and tried to think of the appropriate thing to say. He realized he could look straight down her blouse.

_I like big tits! Uh HUH! That’s a Big Ten-Four! What it is! What it is! TITS!_

He hastily took a step back. “Ah, you see, Janine, I believe you may have misinterpreted what I was trying to say earlier.” Janine leaned forward to hear him better.

_I like tits for breakfast! I like tits for lunch!_

Egon shook his head. Damn that song. It was as catchy as Mozart and his accidental hearing of it was damaging to the poor scientist’s refined sensibilities. “You see, I can't go with you to the movies because I have tickets to the symphony that night. Beethoven? And I was simply hoping you’d prefer accompanying me there instead.” Janine relaxed and smiled. She had jumped to conclusions and her temper had gotten away from her control as usual. Poor Egon.

“Egon, I’d LOVE to hear Beethoven.” She patted the bench invitingly and Egon sat down, relieved. “I’ll swing by and pick you up around seven?” She asked.

_Toucha, toucha, touch me! I wanna be dirrrrty! Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me! Creature of the Niiiiiiiiight!_

“Pick me up at six. The symphony starts at seven. I wish I could pick you up, for a change, but my only car is a converted hearse with a nuclear powered proton cannon on top,” Egon said, smiling. Janine laughed and got up. She motioned for Egon to follow and the two headed back to the firehouse. Egon watched her walk for a moment before catching up. They happily strolled arm in arm back home.

_Then if anything grows, while you pose, I’ll oil you up and rub you down. And that’s just one small fraction, of the main attraction, you need a friendly hand, LORD, I NEED ACTION! Toucha, toucha touch me. Creature of the Night!_

_\--moan--  
_

 

TITS!

The End

 

 

'Toucha Me' is from _Rocky Horror Picture Show_ and 'I Like Big Tits' is by Joe Walsh.


End file.
